I have spent the last 6 Months in Arizona getting treatment. Still doing well and no one can tell I am sick. While in AZ I am unable to post as apparently apple products don’t work with a certain software and this site has it. The other reason I had slowed down on my writing as it lead to a heart breaking experience. I lost a very dear friend over my blog. One thing about emails/letters/texts they can be misinterpreted. I was criticized for only talking about my daughter. Implying I was leaving my other children out. This has lead to losing a very dear friend and worst of all my children being caught in the middle. I feel it is necessary to explain my posts. When I started this blog it was to update all the wonderful people who donated or helped me to get treatment. So my focus was on my cancer journey. Due to lack of childcare my daughter went with me while my other kids stayed home as they were in school. Since she was with me every second of the journey I wrote about her. She was part of my journey. This in no way means anything about how I feel for my other kids. I love them all dearly I was simply focused on the task I was given. I also have a teenager and if you have ever had a teenager you know they don’t want to admit they have parents…lol So I have respected his wishes and his stage in life. My existance mortifies him he certainly doesn’t want me publicizing his life. But I get that as I hate to admit I was once like that and it took many years to understand all the things I had (rules) were to better me and just how life worked. This is why I respect his wishes.
It baffles me that someone can critique someone in my situation. Especially if you know me, you know how I am about my kids. I was shell shocked! I guess what they say is true you really know who your friends are when you hit rock bottom. It is still very hard as I am so very hurt by what occured but I really don’t want to allow my pain to stop my journey. My absence in writing leaves some people thinking that I haven’t made it. Far from it. I still have a batttle but I made two years last month which exceeds expectations! I have learned so much that I want to share with others so that they will not be in my boat. I need to accept the pain and regain my focus. It just was and is quite hard as this person was very special to me. But I need to focus. Please know I love my kids dearly and equally. This blog is not about my kids, I have facebook for that lol.. This is my cancer story meant to inspire others and to educate others from my experiences. I am now going back to AZ for an undetermined time so there may be another laspe in time. I do update my FB page as my phone will work on that. You can like it, fight for trina. I think I may move my blog there while in AZ so people don’t think I died..lol
Thanks for all the suport!
Trina
